The hunt is "on" from the past few years. To be precise, from the moment my ex-manager threw the question on my face, it used to tease me at times and trouble me at some other. The one question in my life that I am afraid to confront at times. The one question that I keeps asking myself and gets lost and pushes off. The one question that I always hope to find the "answer" some-day some-time. The reason is that the answer to that question is very crucial.
The answer to one question that I felt is very important to take my next step. The one answer that can decide my job, my next step, my next thought and may be my next job or my career! The one answer that can either leave me bankrupt or may be millionaire (too optimist huh!). The one answer that can keep my spirits up or pushes me down. The answer that has a potential to make or break my future! The one answer that I have been searching for all these days. The one oasis in my life of desert. Finally, today I saw a glowing street light at the end of the street (for a change tunnels are no longer fashion ).
The one place in the world where my mind can think in peace, tension-free, innovative, being-with-self,introspect,retrospect,think of things-to-do/achieve is my bathroom. That's where I find better ideas in my life :P. Today after having a long discussion with my colleague on some office work, I went for a bath and while taking bath it flashed in my mind- an
almost answer to my question.
Felt like I were walking on bangalore streets late in the night without worrying about the partying dogs. Felt jubiliant, like licking the last spoon of chocolate from the hot-chocolate fudge of my neighbour! Felt like flying in the air minus no air traffic & pollution. Felt like eating the crackling jalebi, off the road side vendor. Felt like drenching in the rain while sipping coffee. Felt like what it feels like gulping 10 panipuri's for one-rupee!
Felt like walking on bangalore pavements breathing fresh air and without a fear of crash! Felt like licking the dew off the leaves or glass blades in the the early winter mornings. Felt like sleeping out in the mid-day sun with a blanket! I almost avoided an
Archimedes=Eurekha act and came out of the bathroom and started composing this post so that I will remember this moment and the day.
Now, not to dissapoint the sincere readers like you who is currently reading this line and feeling irritated about what the heck I am talking about- let me write what I finally found out. I
"think" I found answer to the question- what do I enjoy most?. Yes, I know, it looks awkward, but when I think about myself, think about my life, think about my career, think about technical choices, think about my commitemnts, when I question my decisions, my acts, I always end up with questions like- Do I enjoy this, what exactly makes me excited, what exactly makes me go and do that extra bit, go and commit myself for a cause, propells me, excites me, I always end up with this question and end up with no anwer. But today, I found what I think is almost an anwer for my troubled soul.
So without making you wait any longer, let me tell you what I found! Yeah I swear, unlike in previous paragraph, to reveal
it in this one. I found that - The thought of
"doing" something that has a potential to
"help" someone by saving their effort (or time) or something that can avoid them the pain of going through something which I or someone else had experienced makes me excited and do it with more interest and hence I enjoy doing it!!So when I asked myself for more clarity and when I co-relate with all the activities I do with interest and passion, somehow this seems to answer the WHY part of most of the things I do or I take interest in (refer explanation of doing below). Here is a detailed explanation of the words in italic and quotes in the above statement.
Doing=desinging, supporting, working, thinking, making, co-operating, engaging myselfg into
help=monetary, support(physically/emotionally), make them happy, feel enlightened, enhance knowledge!
So did I find the one that I am looking for?Or did I see the wron'un(IPL jargaon)? Am I imaging too much? Is this just the tip of the ice-cube?(global warming melted the ice-bergs)? Is this the day that I am destined to know more about self? Is this the day that can change my attitude towards life? Only Mr.Time and Mr.God (i am not andrine(mascuilne of faminine??) will answer the new question in my mind= "Is this the one!??".
****The
End begining*****
Oh yeah, I almost forgot- I liked your patience (or impatience in scrolling down directly to read the end) and that lovely smile on your face you sported after reading last few lines. Now co-relate these words with my
answer. Didn'tyou see a relation!? Caugh you napping.. hahaha... enjoy folks... watch out Chandu ver 2.0 is around!
